Just wandered home through Soho on a rainy Thursday evening – having wasted £30 on a massage that really hurt and even more money on revolting health food from the shop next door. Perhaps I am not depressed – I may have a wheat allergy. The truth is I have an allergic reaction to mediocrity that no amount of tofu is going to cure. Why would you call a massage shop Relax anyway? – nothing annoys me more than the non sexual touch of strangers . I only went there because I hurt - I am miserable, exhausted, unappreciated and generally over it and somehow the unhappy state of my life manifests itself in my left shoulder, in pain.
I looked up sadness on Google just now ‘Sadness is an emotion characterized by feelings of disadvantage, loss, and helplessness. When sad, people often become quiet, less energetic, and withdrawn’ so it’s official I am sad. Further research led me to some power ballads on You Tube (I’ll spare you the link) and an interesting article published in The Times discussing how medics have pathologised sadness replacing the s with m and have set about ridding the Western world of the joys of melancholia by recklessly prescribing SSRI’s anti depressants the minute we stop laughing. Thank God for that then - I hope I haven’t thrown them away!