You used to bring me roses

At my age I find that there are so few ‘first times’ available to me. But excitingly I have a Visiting Order for an actual prison visit! Although I have been out with a few men that should have been in jail – I never went out with any one who actually was – not so much an issue of standards simply the lack of opportunity. I was thinking of becoming pen pals with Richard Ramirez (many is the time I have confused pity with love and excitment with danger) but then I read an article that said he had really foul breath which put me right off him. Anyway we are off on a mission to support our friend and I am thrilled to hear that we will be travelling with other visitors to the jail. I shall document the whole thing in the manner of Diane Arbus. I am predicting a high incidence of blond hair extensions, spray tans and inexpensive perfume. I shall wear my tartiest outfit in order to blend. Actually one time I got a photography job and I had to shoot the lifers wing at Wormwood Scrubs. I thought it might be a fun gig – loads of tough tattooed guy like in Con Air but actually it was full of pathetic little men whose real crime was bad luck and lack of opportunity. The truth is I think prisons are a social shame – and that we as a civilised country ought to be able to embrace and rehabilitate people who fall into difficulty within the larger community and that only very dangerous psychopathic people should be locked up.